These 4 Walls they surround me

Sorry Non Gangster lovers, I haven't been given you a CNN like track of my life recently but it has gone into technical difficulties due to a cyclical recurrence of a disease other then the swine flu. Even though this disease is known to result in severe over panic,worry and concern, rest assured it has actually merited these extremes unlike that other disease which has only manipulated into allowing the release of 20 terrorists amongst our prison population. Personally I like the idea because you would now only have to worry about a phone check but a suicide bombing phone check and it would give the terrorists the liberty to create designs in there beard to indicate what side of Afghanistan they are repping. Yes Yes I know it may sound racists but all of the people I have talked about just took my money when i bought this 40 oz of death. Oh and the disease that I have been afflicted with is non other then that wonderful beautiful version of cheer and glee: DEPRESSION.
Yes depression hits us all especially us non gangsters. How are we supposed to survive without hustling and basketball? I wish I was really joking but when finances get tight, creditors start calling you by the name your mama nicknamed you and the landlord only refers to you by the affectionate title of ASSHOLE, you start to really question why you go to work everyday then try to make people laugh. To take that lonely trip home and then get denied the nookie by your girl. Aah the good times of coming home at 2 in the morning every night. Then it all becomes a repetitive vicious circle. Its draining taxing and question do you really have any talent or a purpose to be here but the dangerous side is when you have this convo with no second opinion. That's when thoughts blacken out more then the NBA during the 90's(Shout out to J-L Caulvin on an intelligent look on the decline of the white player in the NBA click here ).
So what do you do then? You hit rock bottom you languish you don't want to be around no-one. Hopefully this only goes on for to days then you begin to smell like a combination of New Jersey and hot dog water(love the old school reference.). But the question is how do you bounce out of it.
My family talked to me. They helped but i still wasn't ready to go through fighting day to day. My God brother helped me but still just was really out of it. I had a strong base behind me but was letting my depression crack through it all. It wasn't until I actually seen the smile on my Godson face that I realized that I wanted to see him grow up and live his life. I wanted to make his life as wonderful as he made mine for the last two years. Sometimes answers aren't in the clouds people. They are in the faces of those that really care for you, Especially the little ones. No exciting sign off just glad to still be alive.