Monday, April 5, 2010

Letter to the Entertainment Industry

Dear Fuckery Department or as the world prefers to call you the Entertainment Industry,
For years I have watched you flood the airwaves and televised broadcasts with more ignorance, re perpetuated stereotypes and less choice then in each of the years prior. Yes we know most of the stereotypes that we see in music videos are true: Black men are more oversexed then rabbits in heat on roofies and black women aren't any good other then being champagne urinals, but there is no need to overstate the obvious, just for the purpose of making people in the street reenact these stereotypes or have young white America believe the hood is a glorious place where every four blocks there are half naked women willing to take champagne being poured on them or that this is the land where drugs are sold and we celebrate by buying bigger cars and champagne to pour out on chicks. I mean that is how I live but white America doesn't need to know that.
Also as comics do we still have to play the shuck and jive roles as the sheisty person reformed from a life of crime only to help the good white guy?(Don't get me wrong I would love one of these roles. Don't confuse my moral compass with someone who refuses to sellout. Black America never bought into me anyway The clapper had more sails in the hood then my comedy CD)Is this the only way we can prove our value to the masses? Is there not one success story that can be considered funny and brilliant without the overuse of stereotypes.
I'm just saying this because I am concerned about your well-being. Your starting to look flabby and sick or as Tupac would say De-La Soul like. Your sales in music are down, TV numbers are dwindling and if James Cameron didn't just save your ass your movie numbers would be shit too. Its just that you don't try to find talent any more, You try to "Create Stars". Not only that you rehash old ideas that were great movies instead of coming up with Fresh new ones of your own. How many times can we see "Guess whose coming to dinner" or honor a movie where the only thing that can save a struggling black person is white people. I am just saying if you tackled race from a socioeconomic standpoint and classism maybe a better product would come across instead of refurbished ideals from the 1960's. Either that or you could have another "Guess whose coming to dinner" with Jackie Chan and also have a karate scene at the end where both parties would get there anger out and kiss and make up. Either Idea would be fine with me.
The other problem I was alluding to before i broke into the bad movie rant was the fact that you try to "create stars" instead of finding talented people and trying to mold them into celebrities. People don't buy rap albums any more because there aren't any good rappers. People don't want to continually see Shia Lebouf in movies because he can't act and Lady GaGa's music is average at best when you compare her to her predecessors. A pretty face may sell shampoo and other products but a true talent can be a voice of a generation, have the loyalty of their followers do whatever is told of them and your corporate dollars can manipulate them even more. But I guess most of these people have minds of there own so you can't manipulate them like the dimwits you mass market now. So Fuckery Department just glad you gave me a little bit of your time and continue to rape my pockets any time a Shia Lebouf movie or a Maino album comes out. Just keep in consideration that in 5 years nobody will pay attention to you at all. Sorry i didn't talk about you television but that is a whole nother letter in itself. Ciao.
Your Pal,
Kyle Bostic

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Changing Gears

Three years waited same shit different levels of the game. Nightly grinding no longer trying to make people laugh I am doing it. Trying to get that major break through but its just not happening. That gets frustrating so I can see how my contemporaries can turn to other things to hold at bay their discontent (I.e. Drugs, Women, wrestling) I though am all in like a bad poker player who thinks one hand can change his luck. I maybe broke now but wait till I lure you in with my ace bet card so you can smack it down with that network doesn't exist any more.
I am finding more and more that I have to do something different, that I have to change gears to be successful, but here-in lies my dilemma: I want success as Kyle D Bostic. I want to justify the open mics, the clubs that wouldn't allow me in their doors earlier in my career. I want to make the people who talk behind my back and I know who they are eat their words beg me for spots and stay cordial with them the whole time. I want to stay the course and be who I am not a carbon facsimile of me that introduced to the masses may initially be lauded but the long term payoff is not there.
How do I do that you ask? Easy I practice. I write day and night keeping my
creative juices flowing. I do the mirror work necessary to succeed. You know
fully dedicated myself to the craft I supposedly love.
Which is the juxtaposition of comedy. It is truly like a marriage when you put yourself all in it and determine yourself to make things work, their is still no guarantee that she won't go and fuck with someone less talented then you. Only this is who you are dedicated to while your parents/friends tell you how there are so many better opportunities out there. Your not listening your not ready your not looking for something that can give you financial satisfaction compared to inner peace. So basically what I am saying is comedy is a prom queen with a unmistakable and unenviable bitch/cunt mentality. I'll be OK though comedy keep fucking with Mike Epps, I still love you though. What can I say I am a glutton for punishment.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Successful Blog

The song goes "I just wanna be, I just wanna be, I just wanna be SUCCESSFUL". Yeah Drake I Fucking Feel Ya and thankfully for him so did the rest of the world. Never has a song had a more universal appeal and a message everybody could identify with sinc e T-Boz's "Touch myself". OH My! Yeah it may had a tad uncatchy hook but it had a great theme that anybody and everybody can identify with. That's why in the '09 I want to switch up to a theme that was more attainable at this point. So for the next couple of paragraph's I just wanna be wanna be I just wanna be undebtful
Yep I share the same dreams General Motors does ppl. We even had other things in common. My debt was acumulating because I kept making shitty grades and theirs was because they made to many shitty cars. So I am waiting for the government to bail me out instead of them calling every week telling that I need to pay GM the money I owe them.
But I am working to get out of it. Working 2 jobs trying to make 1 job money and no job benefits. But bills get paid on time. And by On time I mean CP time like coned will get they bill payment 2 weeks after the final notice. Its just cuz I believe that I need 2 work on my technique of working in the dark.
Na but I am working hard with the shows setting up shows and doing the crazy hustle of both. I want the success I want the debt gone but mostly I want to be recognized. So drizzy buzz I want it so look out for kyledbostic TV, the blog and definitely follow me on twitter kyledbostic. I'm out like the knicks season.

Friday, August 28, 2009

The Black Brett Favre

Is Jay-z becoming the Black Brett Favre? He was supposed to retire after Volume 2 when he said it in the intro. Now we are on volume never ending story that he sold crack. All we need is the white flying dog throwing up the triangle and we are set. We get it your the greatest of all time you done things in this game that nobody ever has done or will do and we will never forget that because you tell us that on every song.

Its crazy writing this because for a long time I was Hova's biggest ally. I had an answer for anything they threw my way. Ask me to explain the sunshine video "Sunshine" I was like puffy dancing fucked up the glow of the suit but it was hot when he first bought it." Ask me to explain the Nas 2nd diss and I would point to that he didn't lose it was just Nas was using word steroids so it should be stricken from the record books. Ask me 2 explain why Memphis Bleek had a career I was finally tongue-tied. Relax though Bleek you are in the will somewhere between Beyonce's huge portion and Ta Ta's share for making sure that Mr. "I wish" wished his tour partner didn't roll so hard. Oh yeah and that was jay-z handing down justice the courts didn't.
But lately I've been flabbergasted at the true similarities between the two all time greats. Both had a period of utter dominance that was unparalleled in their fields Favre with the MVP awards and Hov with the ten straight summers. Both had an uncharacteristic fall from grace Favre with his addiction to pain killers and Jay with the Blueprint 2(Really a Frank Sinatra cover was the way to go after ETHER....! Alert the bitchassness police I think we got a suspect). And the a return to grace only to be tarnished by a comeback.I don't know which was worse Favre Jet year or 'Kingdom Come'. "Show Me What You Got". I'll tell you what you don't have: Another Hit.

Don't get me wrong these two are some of the greatest of all time. But they remind me of when I got He-Man and the Castle of Greyskull for Christmas. It was the greatest thing I ever got and I will always remember the feeling I got when I opened it I still get chills. But that doesn't mean 20 years later I break it out when I have company over like "We're really going to have fun now!!!" That's the way I feel about Jay-Z and Brett Favre. That they should stay in the memories and attics of our mind forever and never come back.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

La da da da hail hail goodbye

The show was great and everything was fine great comics I always have fun at pudge's show @ play lounge. This is prolly the most fun environment - ever been. A bowling alley, pooln drinks and plinko. I am pretty sure it has prostitution if you can stay long enough not that I can condone it but here you can get it at a reasonable price.Pudge Fernandez runs the joint and I can vouch that he is.1 of the hardest working guys in the game. Not that these drinks have anything to do with it but I am downing another henny and coke while I am writing this blog. This is really testing the limits of performance enhancers. I hope I am not tested because I will be suspended for 100 shows. Well at least - can blame it literally on over the counter stimulants. I am out like Lil Wayne kissing Baby

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

If I don't like the things going on around me. Maybe I need to 2 change the things that I'm around

When we last left our nongangster hero, it was real dark and bleary for him. I mean times got real hard like trying to understand Sarah Palin's thought's before the speechwriter's come and do their job of making her competently stupid. I mean your boy had no where to live no certain future I was turning into my worst nightmare; A stereotype of myself. All I was missing was a copy of certain catch phrases like "The White man is holding me down," and my personal favorite "what can I do but just stay black and die". I was about to to give up and quit like Judd Apatow does in every movie. Yep all this time and tales about drugs alcohol and depression was just a trap to lead you into the ultimate climax, a love story which I don't have any idea where it came from. So yes quitting was an option, just a bad one that potentially could ruin a great blog.
So what did I do with all this pressure mounting on my shoulders when I thought I had nowhere to turn to? My mother is in a new relationship and my father is now disabled. My grandmom has enough stress on her hands handling her own rent. Where was I 2 go what was I 2 do?
My best friend saved me like mariano rivera circa 2000 but still a lot of changes needed to be made. No longer could the coochie and alcohol be my masters and the only ppl who could be down with me had to roll like al in the white bronco not roll over like the boys who were actually living at Michael Vick's house. I learned I was master of my own domain king of my own castle(well maybe court jester but at least my spot is reserved. Now who is ready 2 count these millions with me in 2028?

Monday, June 1, 2009

How many more

We interrupt your usual Comical musings to talk about some real shit. Not the realism that is portrayed in videos but the true perspective differences between two communities: African American and suburban America.
Last Thursday as you may know, Officer Omar Edwards was killed as he was first wrongly identified as a perp by fellow Officer Andrew Dunton after he already chased down a thief. A tragedy in all senses of the word that has left the black community mystified and other parts of New York saddened. Recently Charlie Rangel has come into fire for saying that if you are black and don't have the right identification not even President Obama is safe. People have said that this is typical race baiting for a black politician similiar to what Al Sharpton or Charles Barron does on a regular basis but the underlying truth still remains; that there are two different perspectives of Police's role in society and we must do our best to bridge that gap so that justice doesn't seem to be choosing a side it just is what we all want it to be: TRUTH.
First off I commend Congressman Rangel for actually voicing what his community truly feels. Too often, elected officials don't voice to the nation what their constituents really echo, they are just there for a chance to advance their own agendas and soft-pedal it off as an investment for their community. They take on hot-button issue that everyone have resoundingly little effect on their society (i.e Leroy Comrie jumping to stop the use of the N-word in black communities or The Republican War on Drugs).
Just want to truly open the debate about how Police react to blacks as opposed to whites. I hope I can generate a debate